I was looking through some old stuff on my computer and I found my old blog site. I used to love writing, and I still do. Many people probably don’t know that about me. Life got in the way. Work, running a household, sports events, etc. You all know that drill. However, it got me thinking and I said to myself “Today I am going to make a post on my 10 year old blog”. (And by I, I mean myself only, not ChatGPT).
Do people still blog? My 19-year-old son says, “No mom, nobody reads those anymore; that is so old.” But here I go anyway. Will people judge me, talk about me, laugh at me? To that, I say in the famous words of Mel Robbins, #letthem.
I turned fifty this year. FIFTY! AARP, Centrum Silver, achy joints fifty. But being fifty has also inspired me to start reflecting on my life over the decades. If I knew then what I know now would I change anything? And to that, I would say with great enthusiasm an astounding “YES”! Maybe I would invest in bitcoin, learn to control my anxiety better, care less what people thought about me, speak up more, try harder, take care of myself better. Too late. But there is also so much I would not change. I am a lucky gal. I was able to be home mostly to raise my boys. Those three little guys back from 2015 are either grown adults now or pretty close to it. There is so much to say about these amazing kids that I will save it for another time. I am still married after 22 years. We can all relate to the ups and downs of marriage, but we are still standing by each other’s side through thick and thin and he still has my heart.
But man, the world has flipped upside down, and not in a good way. Nothing can ever top Gen-X! Anyway, back to business. I’m a nurse, been doing this gig for almost 20 years now. I got into nursing because I genuinely wanted to help people, you know? But that’s not really how it goes anymore. The healthcare world has totally changed, and we all see it. I can still recall when I made the decision to become a nurse—I thought, “if I can make a difference for just one person, then I’m all in.” Fast forward to now, and here I am feeling burnt out. And when I say burnt out, I mean I’m sizzling by the end of the day, just wanting to crash in my bed. Dealing with patients yelling, folks asking for antibiotics for a simple runny nose, and ignoring the advice they literally asked for. But sometimes, just sometimes, a little spark of hope comes along when someone says, “thank you, you’ve made a difference.” That totally makes my day, but honestly, it doesn’t happen often enough. There’s gotta be more out there for me. I need a place where I can truly make an impact and feel it deep down. I’m on the hunt for that. And I’m not going to stop until I find it. But at my age, where do I even start? Today is my fresh start, and I’m on a mission to chase that fulfilling feeling that sticks with me after I clock out at 5:00. Today is day one. It’s never too late to chase your dreams!
Reboot 